How Recognizing Your Limits Can Be a Strength

I know you’re probably thinking that there’s no way the title can be right… limits are actually strengths? Is this a typo? Nope. I mean what I wrote! Although the actual limitation itself by definition might not be a strength, having self-awareness of our limits can be a huge advantage for us. As I say in my background page - I believe in the power of self-awareness and self-acceptance. It can be freeing to know and accept ourselves, even our limits because it can help us make decisions as we move through life.

Perfectionism and Limits

Limitations and strengths, we all have ‘em. No one is perfect, although some may strive for that persistently. The search for perfection is an always moving goalpost, a peak that will never be reached, and exists only as a way for us to seemingly avoid discomfort - when in reality it puts us in a cycle of disappointment due to unrealistic standards. Allowing ourselves to accept that we’re meant to be imperfect can be the first step to releasing the tethers that perfectionism can have on us.

Perfectionism can often sound like “I’m not good enough” or “I should be doing more.” This pressure can actually do the opposite of motivating us, and instead can set us up for failure and make us less efficient. Using reframing, we can decide to view perfection as an impossibility and start to use our limitations to benefit us.

Setting Realistic Standards

A great example of how recognizing limits can be a strength presents itself in the holiday season that’s upon us. Have you ever taken on too much - agreeing to 3 different Friendsgivings, hosting a holiday party, baking cookies, helping family decorate, so on and so forth. All of a sudden you feel stretched thin and unable to give attention to each commitment you scheduled. Here is a place where perfectionism could thrive by pushing to be 2 different places at once and still get every thing done, leaving you feeling stressed, depleted, and resentful. This could be an opportunity to recognize that realistically you have limits to what you’re able to accomplish and still take care of yourself.

Using awareness to set realistic standards can allow you to be present and enjoy the activities you choose to engage in. Realistic standards might look like only attending 1 Friendsgiving, decreasing the amount of baking, and asking for friends to bring food to help with your holiday party. It also may look like not engaging with the idea of perfectionism and practicing self-compassion with what you have accomplished.

If you find yourself having a hard time with setting realistic expectations, reach out to set up a consultation!

Tina Leboffe, MA, LPC, NCC, CCATP

*Please note that this blog is for your information only and does not constitute clinical advice or establish a client-counselor relationship.